Can someone really be a good person? Or a bad person? Or are there just choices you make, actions you perform, which determine what you are?
And if so, can you change by simply changing the choices you make, or is it programmed into you to make bad choices or good ones?
People say people change, others say they don't. I'm torn. On the surface, I'd say people won't change unless something drastic happens, like moving to a completely new way of life, or losing something important, or cheating death, you know, newsworthy stuff. But having said that, I've noticed a few changes in some people recently, and it has surprised me BUT... i'm not convinced they're permanent changes. I just don't think there's anything that can intercept the biological programming in your brain that defines which path you take.
Some people are destined to make the right choices, succeed and then be as happy as larry. Others, not so much.
Have you ever got that feeling when you know you're setting yourself up for something bad to happen, yet you go ahead with it anyway? And then you still end up surprised when it all falls down, and you end up as hurt as you would be if you didn't expect it. I guess that's the thing people refer to as 'hope'. The hope that it won't all crumble down, and the hope that for once things might just work out and give you that bit of happiness, even just for a short while.
I'm one of those people who expects things to crash and burn, nothing lasts forever, happiness is a state of mind affected by factors which are always in a state of flux, therefore you can never be properly happy for a long time as there's too much change going on for it to remain consistent. There's no such thing as an inconsistent consistency, it just doesn't work. I'm not say happiness doesn't exist, i'm not a pessimist, I just think you can't be permanently happy, as things enforce themselves on you to test your emotions daily, so you can't always walk around with a big genuine grin, as it's impossible to be that way. People who are always happy worry me, as it's not possible to be happy all the time, they seem like they're setting themselves up for a breakdown as they don't allow any negative emotions to flow.
So back to the point, can you truly be a bad person? Even bad people can do good things, so does that make them better, even good? Is it such a simplistic belief to think that there are only negative and positive actions, and a person is like a set of scales. The more bad actions, the more it tilts left, the more good, the more it tilts right. If someone grew up being good and then decided to make a hell of a lot of bad decisions, why are they seen as misguided and off the rails rather than downright bad? Whereas someone in the opposite position is seen as suspicious and dishonest for their sudden change, although both have the potential to do the same things?
Have you ever really thought about the choices and actions you have performed and thought wow, i'm not that nice of a person? Like really sat there and scrutinised your life from point A, and realised that maybe you're not so nice? Maybe you're not so honest? Maybe you're not as loyal as you thought? It's almost scary to think of it like that. I strongly believe there is no one in the world who hasn't made a bad choice, or been selfish and hurt someone for their own good, some more than others granted, but still... no one can be completely tilted to the good side.
Perhaps being selfish isn't that bad, after all you'll always be there for you, whereas you cannot guarantee anyone else will. Sad thought? Yes. Pessimistic? No, i prefer the term realistic. A very intelligent friend of mine said to me, I prefer the phrase
'Expect the worst, but hope for the best'.
He said it's not blind optimism but it's not miserable pessimism either, and it makes a lot of sense when you think about it.
So i'll leave that as the closing statement, and continue to ponder about the good, the bad, and the downright scary...
